August. A time of endless hope and consequence-free predictions.
HOORAY!
- We launched the blog that launched a thousand points. We promised comprehensive Penn State coverage, heavy doses of silliness, and absolutely no discussion about Jerry Sandusky and Those Who Knew. So far, so good.
- Penn State got a new football locker room and the players reacted like little kids on Christmas morning.
- RLR introduced “tuddies” into the Penn State consciousness. Little did we know it would be adopted by the football program’s official Instagram account, painted onto a student’s Beaver Stadium end zone banner, printed onto hundreds of shirts, and loathed by some dead-end curmudgeons that hate fun, innocent things.
- Speaking of tuddies, have you met Joe Moorhead? Turns out he was looking for some tuddies this fall, too.
- Saquon Barkley proved once again that he is from another planet.
- James Franklin named Trace McSorley starting quarterback. Good luck with that choice, dummy.
UH….WHAT?
- James Franklin invited his former Vandy quarterback and Bachelorette contestant Jordan Rodgers to Beaver Stadium. Because, sure.
- We sent Tom into the world of Pitt message boards. Tom died. Then we sent him to Rutgers message boards. Legal proceedings from his estate are ongoing.
- You could’ve had 20-1 odds on Penn State to win the Big Ten. Get a time machine and go do that.
- Penn State got into a fight with Jimmy John’s. We sent our Action News Investigation Team (okay, it was Bill) to get answers. Then, Tom (who previously died) gathered up the Twitter reaction.
- Rutgers brought in a hypnogician to...whatever, it didn’t work.
- James Franklin broke up the heat of August practices with a pool party.
- Citizens Bank released their blue button slogans for 2016. We improved them.
- We pestered Dick Vitale and Curt Schilling on Periscope.
Tomorrow, we look at September. Hope it isn't filled with any soul crushing losses on the football field!